I Watched Borat 2 So You Don't Have to.

I watched the new Borat movie with The Husband last night in order to divert my attention from the ulcer-inducing debate. I have a few thoughts. 

A few caveats are necessary. 

1. I hated the first Borat movie. I couldn't get through even half of it. I am not a lover of gross-out comedy and I revile "bodily fluid comedy" even more. The scene in Something About Mary that involved semen was positively repellent to me.

2. While Borat has never been on the top of my movie favourites, I do recognize the social satirizing genius that is Sacha Baron Cohen. From Ali G, to Borat, to Bruno, to his underrated HBO series Who is America? I am in continual amazement at the number of real-life idiot-savants who gladly offer themselves up to him as tributes for his burning dung pile of moronic self-owning schtick. I also think that Mr. Cohen is a fine dramatic actor who has done yeoman's work in Les Misérables, Sweeney Todd, Hugo, The Spy, and most recently, as Yippie founder Abbie Hoffman in The Trial of the Chicago 7. My distaste for Borat has very little to do with Sacha Baron Cohen.

3. The Husband and both sons loved the first Borat. I think it is a Y-chromosome thing that seems to increase the enjoyment the more fluent you are in Hebrew. 

With all of that clearly understood, I sat with The Husband as he dove in headfirst. The movie itself is everything that I expected it to be. It is crude, massively politically-incorrect, and at times, flat out physically disgusting. The plot, (I use this term loosely) is based on the premise that our favourite Kazakhstanian reporter must redeem himself from the shitshow and embarrassment he caused during his last foray into the United States. He wants to get as close to the hierarchy of power as he can so that he might offer up his fifteen-year-old daughter as a vestal virgin-type gift to whatever scumbag Republican politician or Trump-adjacent skank will take the bait. His redneck odyssey takes him to some of America's most hollow and soulless places and he meets up with a variety of lead paint eating, mouthbreathers who if they were cast in a Hollywood movie, every producer would turn them down because they are so ridiculous and unbelievable. I still cannot believe that these assholes exist but, exist they do and they are more than willing to prostrate themselves with unspeakable embarrassment to Cohen/Borat. And therein lies, why this film, as ugly as it is, matters so very much ten days out from the most important world election of our time. It is crucial that we know what kind of lunacy and hypocrisy are taking place in areas outside of our own personal bubbles and it is even more crucial that we expose it. Nowhere in the film is that more important than the lurid and horribly ugly scene involving the President's free lawyer, Rudy Giuliani. 

If you have seen the still photographs that are wandering around the intertubes of Rudy lying on his back on a hotel bed with his left hand down his pants seemingly fondling his junk, you will have already formed an opinion of what might have occurred. When I tell you that it is so much worse in the film and it is only by the grace of Sacha Baron Cohen interrupting the escapade, that Rudy is saved from his lurid self. If Mr. Cohen has done anything during this film, it is to expose Rudy for the fucktard that he is and to put an end to any credibility of "October Surprise" he might peddle. I have absolutely no doubt that if Cohen had let the scene play out, we might have had to bear witness to the dick pic to end all dick pics.

There is a lot about the virus and the botched CoVid response and given that Cohen filmed this during the summer across the US, he was able to really make the film feel timely. The one thing that I did notice is that he had to get far more elaborate with his costumes. He is definitely far more recognizable than ever before and he had to really lay on the make-up, wigs, fat suits, and facial hair in order to conceal his identity. Too many people are on to him and his gags. 

The film is short, only an hour and a half, and is clumsy in its editing because it was so obviously rushed to Amazon Prime before the election. I would urge you to watch it because there is a genius method to the madness and it is incredibly timely. But if you are looking for fine art, this is surely not the film. That said, The Husband roared with laughter and he absolutely loved it. There goes that Y-chromosome thing again.

What I Want in My Mayor.

I had a conversation the other day with my hairstylist. This jabbering is something women tend to do with the people charged with the sacred duty of cutting our hair. I think that maybe we converse like this in order to distract us from the fact that the person holding the scissors standing behind us has the potential and ability to make us look like Pee Wee Herman. So we civilly engage in these banalities in order to avoid such a fate.

On this day we discussed the upcoming municipal elections. Since I still travel up into the suburbs for my haircuts, (I know it is ridiculous but the woman has been cutting my hair since before Younger Son was born) I was a bit surprised to realize how little she understood about the mess that was made of the Toronto civic vote by our vindictive and arrogant new premier. I get that she doesn't live in Toronto and will cast her ballot in a city north of us but she really didn't understand the subtleties of Premier DoFo's meddling in an already in process election and the chaos that this has caused to our rights as citizens to a free and informed vote. While we can argue the merits of reducing the number of councillors in the city, the craziness of doing this three months before the vote when it had been informed, studied, and approved three years ago was political malpractice. There was absolutely no disguising the motives of the premier and while he did win the legality argument in court, the resulting chaos and disengagement of Toronto voters have been palpable. Many council candidates and voters have been confused as to which riding they are a part of or where they are now running. Several incumbents have found themselves running against council colleagues and there have been no debates that have featured the two front-running mayoral candidates one on one. Our incumbent and uninspiring mayor has ridden the wave of apathy towards what looks like a landslide victory tomorrow. The whole mess has me thinking what I want in a mayor for this wonderful but still stagnating city. I will preface these comments with the fact that both of the front-runners are decent, educated, and kind people who I believe only have the good of the city at heart. For one of the only times in my recent voting history, the choice between the two candidates at the head of the pack doesn't involve a scum-sucking corrupt hack who is only interested in his/her own power that comes complete with the demonization of minorities, the disadvantaged, or the raiding of the municipal coffers.

And so...with that in mind.... 

I want a mayor who will stand strong for the city in the face of a meddling provincial government and a premier who wants to use the city as his personal Lego set. I want to see some passion when the mayor confronts DoFo and not total capitulation. When the premier comes for our subways, and make no mistake that is most definitely coming, will the mayor publicly defend this city and tell him to back off or will he/she call for some bullshit referendum?  The mayor of Toronto needs to lead this city in defiance and in a crusade against the damage that Queen's Park is already causing.

I want a mayor who relies on evidence-based and economically sound principals when planning for the city. I don't want back-of-the-napkin transit solutions dishonestly sold to the electorate because there are votes to be had in Scarborough or North York. We are all one city and the integration of transit must be done with all stakeholders in mind. 

I want a mayor who takes the Vision Zero strategy seriously and not in stages. It has been two years since council adopted it and so far this year, there have been more than 50 cycling or pedestrian deaths on Toronto roads. 2018 is on pace to be the deadliest ever. As a driver, transit user, and pedestrian, I have been in more dangerous situations this year than I can count. I want a mayor who understands that creating safe cycling, walking, and transit opportunities is the key to Vision Zero and that even one death on our roads is abhorrent. Worrying about an extra minute for drivers' travelling times is regressive. This city needs a transportation visionary.

I want a mayor who is progressive and sees the city's long game. I think that trying to find a compromise in many issues is commendable but often short-sighted. The east end of the Gardiner should be torn down in order to release the potential of the waterfront. Spending an extra billion dollars to maintain it in order to save drivers 3 minutes in travel time is regressive. Cities all over the world are removing elevated highways while Toronto is trying to save this crumbling and ugly piece of 1940's infrastructure. The Yonge corridor north of the 401 should be reduced to two lanes in each direction in order to create a walkable plaza in downtown North York. This plan has been championed by city planners and transit experts alike. The community wants it. I want a mayor who recognizes that cars are not king.

I want a mayor who will commit to and fight for our most vulnerable. I want funding restored for the safe injection clinics that are on the frontlines of the opioid crisis. I want funding restored for shelters for abused women and children. I want a mayor who recognizes that there are not nearly enough cold-weather shelters for those on the streets and doesn't need to be cajoled and embarrassed into opening up the armories when the temperature drops. I want a cohesive and immediate plan that sees the unlocking of city land to be used for affordable housing and not merely for the profit of greedy developers. 

I want a mayor who will champion programs for at-risk youth and commit to finding the funds. It is a fundamental step to helping curb the gun violence on our streets.

I want a mayor who will invest in green initiatives including demanding proper stormwater management and the greening of rooftops in all new condo buildings. 

I want a mayor who understands that all of this cannot be achieved without new sources of revenue and who sees property taxes as the communal fund that works for the betterment of this city and all of its citizens.

These are just a few of the things that I will be thinking about when I cast my ballot tomorrow.  Toronto deserves it all and not just a nice, decent guy.

Normalizing the Profoundly Abnormal

I promised myself time.

Time to decompress and time to gather my thoughts following a crushing body blow rendered to all the values I hold dear.

I promised myself that I would take a bit of a break from social media, newspapers, and television. I am not interested in being told that it will all be fine. I am not interested in the punditry informing me of the rhymes and reasons for this nightmare. I am wholly disinterested in the dissection of blame and errors and miscalculation. I am not placated by prayers and I am not solaced by the redemption story that is surely spinning to normalize the profoundly abnormal.

I haven't read a single think piece, blog post, or published letter from any source since Tuesday. I have avoided Twitter and the echo chamber. I know that it is all out there. It always is following times of tremendous upheaval. But I am not eager to read any of it.

But, I do feel the need to express my own emotions. That is why I set up this space for myself, as a vehicle for venting. As readers, you are free to disregard or disagree with any or all of it. So, here goes.

The sun rose as expected on Wednesday and aside from the raging agony of an upset stomach and exhaustion from lack of sleep, my life wasn't profoundly different. My family is healthy and happy. (Thanks to the Divine Spirit.) I am warm and comfortable and living in one of the safest and most progressive places on the planet. I am afforded countless opportunities and I am financially secure. My petty complaints have become fodder for silly pieces and sarcastic jokes in this space. On the surface, all is right in my world.

Except accepting that notion above all else would be to deny the obvious. I am a white, middle-aged, upper-middle class, recently transplanted suburban to urban woman. But...

I am not the person of colour being heckled on the street by flaming racists to return to a country in which I have never lived.

I am not the hijab-clad Muslim woman who fears outwardly for her safety by practicing her religion.

I am not the undocumented student who came to the United States as an infant and knows of no other country to call home.

I am not a Latina child being bullied in the playground of her school being told that in this new America she will be forced to go elsewhere.

I am not lesbian, gay, transgender, or queer and being told that love only matters for straight people.

I am not disabled and being cruelly mocked for that which I am unable to do.

I am not an African-American man who is fearful every single time I see a police officer.

I am not a single woman who attracts unwanted catcalls and sexual assaults masquerading as locker room behaviour.

Rather,

I am a person of immense privilege who can hide behind a veil of caucasian.

I am a Jew who, in my lifetime, has only seen the very tip of anti-Semitism and is more frightened than ever by the open display of swastikas, Nazi salutes, Auschwitz cartoons, and dog whistles to The Protocols of the Elders of Zion. 

I am a woman who remembers what it was like as a girl in high school when some strange boy actually did grab my pussy.

I am a person of faith who spent her career trying to justify and explain her place on the bimah to some very privileged Jewish men.

I am of the generation who has thoughtlessly abused our natural resources and was hoping to help remedy that massive error and leave this planet in better shape for the generations to follow.

I am a Canadian who is very aware that it can happen here too.

You see, the world did change on Tuesday night. It became a place where the now most powerful person in the world has given tacit permission for all of the aforementioned. He has, without apology, made it acceptable for hate groups to actively march again. He has, without a hint of irony,  encouraged these slimeballs out of their hovels and into the mainstream. He has set brother upon brother, he has fostered distrust amongst neighbours, he has encouraged ignorance, and he has denounced science.

Through a campaign of hate-mongering and fear, one man unleashed all of that. One man took the lid off of Pandora's box and he cannot, no matter how much he might want to (Really? who believes that he wants to?) close it back up and return the vermin to their sewers.

For the first time in my life, I am truly afraid. I fear for my friends and family south of the border. I fear that when I visit my other home, my tanned olive skin might make me a target. I fear that wearing Jewish symbols might lead to confrontation. I fear the anger and I fear the hate.

I will undoubtedly move past my fears. I will undoubtedly find a constructive vehicle in which to channel my passion for equality and social justice and to stand resolutely opposed to everything this hate-monger has unleashed. I will undoubtedly find a way to battle hate with love.

Until then, I need the space to vent my outrage. I need for that emotion to be validated and not placated or patronized.

I need you all to understand that what has happened can never be normalized.

Not for me.

America: May God Have Mercy on Your Soul

Here are some things that I absolutely will not miss from this year's clown car show south of the 49th.

• Memes on Facebook
• Any news story that leads with the word "email"
• False equivalencies of evil
• Discussions of penis size
• Use of the word "pussy"
• The need for fact checking
• Vladamir Putin's half-naked image on a horse
• Wikileaks
• Bernie Bros
• Pepe the frog
• The suspension of Godwin's Law
• Neo-Nazis
• The KKK and the reemergence of David Duke
• The word "rigged"
• Incuriosity
• Ignorance
• Bloviating
• Political surrogates from any party but in particular.....
• Rudy Guiliani and Newt Gingrich
• Pantsuits
• Telling a woman to smile more
• Irony-impairment
• Tic Tacs and Skittles
• Access Hollywood
• The Apprentice
• Bill Clinton's parade of women
• The FBI
• Hypocrites
• The Trump spawn
• "Locker Room Talk" used to explain sexual assault
• Chants of "Lock Her Up"
• Super PACs and their ads
• The need for distractions
• Stupid nicknames. Adios to Crooked Hillary, Lyin' Ted, Little Marco, and the rest
• DONALD TRUMP 

Feel free to add your own. Racism, misogyny, bigotry, xenophobia, and hate have no place in a civil society. Good luck America. May God have mercy on your soul.

I Apologize For Abandoning My Sunny Ways...The Stakes Are Just Too High

I have thought long and hard about whether or not I would post one more thing about this soul-sucking sideshow Americans are laughingly calling an election. As a Canadian peering over the backyard hedge, it is kind of like watching your neighbour dig a sewer near your house without having a say as to where it goes. That said, we Canadians refuse to pretend that this shitshow isn't affecting us. The old joke about when the US sneezes Canada catches a cold has never felt more relevant or true.

I had promised my readers distractions and generally positive posts leading up to November 8th, but the stakes are just too high. Trump's closing campaign ad which was released this weekend has been widely condemned and criticized by Jewish leaders as being filled with classic anti-Semitic tropes and images of Jewish bankers and monetary leaders.
The Anti-Defamation League has decried the ad for "rhetoric and tropes that historically have been used against Jews and still spur antisemitism.” Rabbi Jonah Pesner, the Director of the Religious Action Committee released the following statement:

We denounce, in the strongest possible terms, the use of contemptuous and historically anti-Semitic tropes in the recent campaign ad of presidential candidate Donald Trump. References to 'the establishment' and a 'global power structure,' juxtaposed over images of Jewish public figures, create thinly-veiled allusions to centuries-old anti-Semitic propaganda.  

This latest ad is, regrettably, part of a pattern of the use of such words and imagery that has been repeated by the Trump campaign over many months. There is no place in civil political discourse for the perpetuation of harmful and baseless stereotypes. It is the responsibility of every candidate for elected office to promote the interests of all Americans, without resorting to dangerously xenophobic and otherwise bigoted rhetoric or insinuations.

If you are a Jewish Trump supporter and you don't hear these dog whistles, then nothing I can do or say is going to change your mind or your vote. I can say that I am thoroughly disappointed that you have gotten so complacent and comfortable in your bubbles that you have neglected to recall the lessons of the past.

Last December I wrote the following post during Chanukah from Florida. It was early in the primaries and Florida was just gearing up for their dance. I am reposting it here because my sentiments from that time have not changed, except to say that I am more anxious and fearful for my friends, family, and neighbours to the south. Tomorrow is a crucial day in world history. I beg you all to get out and vote for the America that we the world know you are. Denounce hate. Renounce bigotry. The choice is clear. When we say never again, we mean for anyone.

Demagoguery

Tonight I lit Chanukah candles with a gentleman from my building who happens to be a Holocaust survivor. Since this is South Florida and it has been unbearably humid, he was suitably dressed for the climate in a short-sleeved golf shirt. As we chatted, it was difficult not to notice the numbers tattooed on his forearm. I have had many conversations with this man over the years and I have always marvelled at his strength and fortitude in keeping his horrific experiences alive in the hearts and minds of the next generations through his participation in education programs, speeches, and countless trips back to Auschwitz on March of the Living. But tonight, we were just a group of Jews lighting candles to recall our people's struggle against another tyrant living centuries before the one he survived.

And then I came upstairs and watched Donald Trump's latest foray into demagoguery. I watched as supporters at his rally shouted "Heil Donald Trump-THE ULTIMATE SAVIOUR"  and it sent shivers up and down my spine. Trump's completely fascist call to ban all Muslims from entry into the United States can no longer be dismissed as the ravings of fringe entertainer. Tonight he and his supporters entered a new realm of right-wing jingoism, Neo-Nazism, and totalitarianism that every thinking person in the United States and around the world should vociferously denounce. Usually, I am loathed to evoke memories of or comparisons to Hitler, and I can't ever remember calling up Godwin's law before, but Trump and his  supporters are definitely skirting a dangerous line. When protestors are physically attacked at his rallies; when overt hatred of Muslims is spouted by his supporters; when white supremacist organizations are now a solid part of his base; we can no longer ignore the comparisons.

I have had several conversations recently with Jews who are ardent Trump supporters and I have to admit to being baffled. Now I am just disgusted. It is no longer acceptable for Jews (or anybody else) to support this dangerous fascist bigot knowing what we know and knowing the extreme consequences of actions like the ones he is proposing. Trump's call to isolate and bar Muslims is one step away from the Judenfrei policies of Hitler's Nazis.

Tonight, in response to Trump's announcement, Rabbi Jonah Pesner, Director of the Religious Action Centre of Reform Judaism issued the following statement:

While we take no position on Mr. Trump's candidacy for president, we condemn in the strongest terms his comments calling for barring the entry of Muslims into the United States. As Jews who too often suffered persecution because of our faith, we cannot abide religious bigotry.

Our nation, founded by those fleeing religious persecution, is rooted in principles of religious freedom. The absence of religious tests for entry or for office and the freedom of every individual to practice their religion are sources of national strength, not weakness.

It is time for Jews of all political stripes to speak up and finally suppress Trump and his dangerous rhetoric. Jewish Republicans need to find another candidate and they need to say this man is anathema to everything that Americans hold dear. At this season when we recognize light over darkness, religious freedom over persecution, and rededication over hate, Americans must commit themselves to vanquishing this dangerous hyperbole before innocent people suffer. It is a debt that this generation of Jewish Americans owes to people like the man in my building. 

A Cynic's Journey Towards Positivity. (Or...How to Get Through to November 8th Without Committing Mass Murder.)

I am blogging today because, in all honesty, I am finding my social media feeds and television to be downright depressing. If I see one more meme about ANYTHING I might just have to chop down the closest tree, whittle it thinly into toothpicks, and then very slowly insert each one most painfully into my eyeballs and ear canals thereby rendering me blind and deaf until after this shitstorm is over.

Please just make it stop already. All of us. STOP!

So, my pledge to whatever faithful readers I still have left is my unwavering commitment to post nothing but my version of positivity until after November 8th. If I should falter, you all have my permission to inundate me, until the end of my days, with a continuing loop of the most heinous disco music ever recorded. I plan on posting quite a few in this sanguine series, so I apologize in advance for making myself a nuisance. Call it my coping mechanism.

Today's entry into this confirmed cynic's view of "What Makes My World Great" is a brief moment of my day.

You know that feeling you get when a stellar song from a favourite Broadway musical enters into your playlist, and it makes you smile, and you realize that the real reason you're smiling is because you actually saw this person perform said number live, and you recall greatness?

Yah. That.

Today I had that moment while on the treadmill with Andrea Martin singing "Just No Time at All" from Pippin. By the way when we saw it? She flat out stopped the show. A five-minute standing ovation. This is so worth the 8 1/2 minutes you will spend watching it. Trust me. It's Bigly.

My Canada

In yesterday's Toronto Star, columnist Chantal Hébert wrote one of the best missives I have read this election cycle about the fundamental differences between Canada and the United States and where our two countries are headed politically. I urge you to click on the hotlink above and read it, not merely because I have asked you to, but because I do believe that many of my American friends are fundamentally stunted when it comes to understanding the Canadian psyche. A case in point was the totally vapid and mindless "comedy" essay that Jim Gaffigan did on Canada on CBS' Sunday Morning today.

In his defense, Gaffigan was going for satire and a comical turn basically informing Americans fearing the final election results that Canada is an odd place with odd likes and customs and that fleeing here might not be in an escapee's best interests. He peppered his routine with tired Canadian tropes and stereotypes about poutine and hockey and he finished up by questioning why we have a maple leaf on our flag. Frankly, it was lazy, based on zero research, and fundamentally the worst kind of comedy in that it was profoundly stupid. George Carlin was moaning someplace in the great beyond about the death of the esoteric comedian. And all of this is coming from somebody who really likes Jim Gaffigan.

I realize that there are a lot of Americans who are turning an eye northward in this time of profound schisms and misery. This election has been a holy host of horrors and if I were one of you, I might also be investigating an exit strategy. Of course, realistically most Americans will deal with the fallout of whatever happens because, when you get right down to it, this is what is most endearing about Americans; the strength and resilience to fight through the tribulations. This fighting spirit has kept them on top of the world's stage for almost two and a half centuries and I have little doubt that they will persevere for at least a bit longer.

But, if there really are Americans thinking about Canada as an option, (and please understand that it isn't as easy as merely showing up at the border wearing a Josh Donaldson jersey) and if it is a truly serious thought, it needs to be said that we are so much more than the butt of a hockey stick or the scarlet tunic of a Mountie. We are a people with everyday issues, everyday problems, and everyday feelings of pride.

We are a country who...

Has rallied as an entire country behind a single team, the Toronto Blue Jays because Major League Baseball sent our only other team to Washington. The ratings this fall for Blue Jays postseason games show that more than seven million people watched the final game of the ALDS. Seven million!! In a country of not quite 35 million. This is a rating's number that clobbers even the biggest hockey game of the year, including the Stanley Cup finals. It rivals the number of Canadians who watched Andre DeGrasse win bronze in the 100M at this summer's Olympics. (Yes..we celebrate great achievement, not just winners.) We are a fierce and proud people and we will defend our own with passion and poignancy. Canadians cheer on Canadians, even if they hail from the US, Dominican Republic, and Mexico, no matter what. Yes. It is true that hockey is a national obsession, but our national self-esteem is all about supporting those who display the best of who we are even if they can't skate.

We are a country who...

Values achievement and collective responsibility. In a television program entitled The Greatest Canadian that aired on the CBC back in 2004, Canadians were invited to vote on who they thought best fit the title. There wasn't an entertainer or sports figure in the top five. Coming in at number 1 was Tommy Douglas, the father of universal health care and a former premier of Saskatchewan. (OK. He was also the grandfather of Kiefer Sutherland, so I suppose that there is a wee bit of entertainment value to this pick.) Rounding out the top five were activist and humanitarian Terry Fox, Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau, Dr. Frederick Banting, the co-discoverer of insulin, and environmentalist David Suzuki. We can argue fiercely about politics and there are still people who think that Pierre Trudeau was the devil incarnate and therefore Justin is his evil spawn, but we tend to look at our politics through a uniquely pragmatic lens. I would venture to guess that while there are many who would like to improve upon our flawed health care system, there are very few who would like to abandon it altogether.

We are a country who...

Tends to cherish civil discourse even amongst our most polarizing figures. When Rob Ford passed away earlier this year, the entirety of city council was there to pay their respects, even those who voted to strip him of his magisterial powers and his most vocal critics. This weekend, former Harper cabinet minister and conservative Alberta premier Jim Prentice, was tragically killed in a small plane crash. He was praised and eulogized by politicians on all sides of the political spectrum. We are far from perfect. The problems and conditions that allowed for Rob Ford's horrific mayoralty in the first place still plague us, but even those who despised him while in office and the brand of politics he practiced, found some small modicum of decency in the man himself and felt sorrow for his family. We don't always succeed at civility, but we certainly aspire towards it.

We are a country who...

Cherishes our inherent beauty. Mr. Gaffigan asked, "why do we have a Maple Leaf as our national symbol on our flag?" It's because we look upon the beauty of our natural environment with pride and deep gratitude. Yes, it is easy to make maple syrup and pancake jokes and in fairness it is one of our great commodities, but the Maple Leaf symbolizes our deep and abiding love for the earth we were entrusted to protect. Our flag is reflective of that emotion. (I should mention that the final flag design was a compromise representation that consumed Canadian passions fifty years ago. In typical Canadian fashion, neither side was rewarded with the win. Today, our flag is recognized the world over as a symbol of inclusivity and we Canucks don't slap those patches on our luggage simply because we don't want to be mistaken as Americans, but rather because we are fiercely proud of the red and white.)

We are a country who...

Tends to adopt the best of others and make them our own. Ours is a cultural mosaic rather than a melting pot. We encourage diversity and we welcome the changes. It isn't always easy and we have  had major battles from all points on the political and cultural spectrum that has threatened the very fabric of our collective consciousness, but we do tend to move positively and timely with social mores. As Ms. Hébert correctly states in her column,

That is not to argue that unanimity reigns supreme in Canada or that it should. But clashes over the best approach to policy are symptoms of a healthy democracy, as is dissent. The noise that attends both does not alter the fact that on many of the principles that polarize other comparable societies there are Canadian consensus views that stand to outlast the popularity of the current prime minister, just as they did the Harper decade.

Yes, it is true that we are a country who loves our hockey, poutine, Mounties, maple syrup, moose, beavertails, toques, and coloured plastic money. But it is also true that we are an incredibly diverse people who are profoundly exhausted by the ignorance of our closest cousins, neighbours, and largest trading partner as to who we really are. Yes, we have a bit of an inferiority complex brought on by living next door to a behemoth and yes, while we tend to export the best comedians on the planet south of the 49th, we do often have a bit of difficulty laughing at ourselves. But, this election season offers a perfect opportunity for our American friends to lovingly discover just who we are and what we stand for. This country isn't perfect and it isn't a quick-fix for all that ails disenchanted and disenfranchised Americans this cycle, but it is home and I couldn't be more proud of it.

Baseball and Ballots

I am still in a state of euphoria after last night's wild ride masquerading as a Blue Jays game. Toronto  fans are well-acquainted with the emotions that Ranger fans must be experiencing today. We just don't get to win all that often, so we accept the uniqueness of being on the victorious side of something so crazy with unabashed happy dancing. Forgive us our minor gloating and hero worshiping. This too shall pass, and we will return forthwith to our loveable nature and national sense of decorum and collective restraint.

That said, there is something about the scheduling of these post season games that does have me a tad concerned. While it has been well-documented as to the timing of Blue Jay/Rangers games, (three out of the five games played were scheduled as weekday afternoon games, thus causing much "blue flu" and consternation amongst bosses and workplaces) I actually do understand the logic coming from Major League Baseball. Toronto simply isn't a major market for their advertisers, and in order to maximize television revenue for their sponsors they would rather see the primetime games coming from New York, Los Angeles, or Chicago. Not ideal for us up here in the Great White North, but we Canadians are nothing if not adaptable. We managed.

But now that we are through to the ALCS, another problem is in the offing. Game Three is scheduled for Monday October 19th, the same day as the federal election. On Facebook today I wrote the following:

I have had about 12 hours to decompress and to think. I need to share this one again. I cannot believe that MLB would schedule a Canadian team to play in a playoff game on Federal Election Day. That would NEVER happen in the US. That said, it is what it is and we need to get the word out. Rooting for our beloved Boys in Blue is fun and necessary, but not as essential as each and every fan casting their ballot. On Monday, please go vote first then get ready to party. Please pass this on. It is vital.

An American friend called me out on it and said the following:

Please vote. Please root for the Blue Jays. But please know that in the US this would ABSOLUTELY happen. Election day is not even a national holiday here. It's life as normal. I think the only difference is that in many (not all) states you cannot buy alcohol until after the polls close.

After some back and forth, we realized that we were actually in agreement. What I was trying to express is that I cannot recall any major sporting event ever being held on that Tuesday in November when Americans are at the polls electing their president, and I feel as though we here in Canada should be afforded a similar courtesy. He was simply stating that pop culture seems to trump (sorry for the bad pun) all, including issues of national import.

My issue with the game being played on Monday is that we here in Canada are a one-team country. Canadians from coast to coast have been riding the Blue Jay bandwagon all season as was evidenced by what happened yesterday. The game's timing could absolutely help to suppress the vote, especially on the west coast where people might be leaving work and heading to the bars or home rather than the polling stations. We have enough trouble with turnout. We don't need more help or excuses.

I understand that MLB has a schedule to keep and if the Rangers had prevailed yesterday this would not be an issue, but they didn't and it is. There is something to be said about special circumstances and a federal election in my mind would certainly qualify. Monday should be an off-day for this series so that Canadians can attend to their highest priority that day, voting for the party that will lead us and guide us for the next four years. As much as I can't believe that I'm saying this, the ballgame is not as important as that.

I am under no delusions that the game's time will change, so it is up to all of us to spread the word. If you know of people who are on the fence about voting because it will not fit into their Monday schedule, harangue them until they get to the polls. This election is simply too close and too important to be called on account of the Blue Jays, no matter how much we love and admire them. Attend to your civic responsibility first and then get ready to party. This team has made all Canadians proud. It is our turn to make them proud.

On October 19th...Get out and vote and then cheer like hell for YOUR TORONTO BLUE JAYS!

I Voted Today.

I voted today.

In an advance poll for the first time ever.

On a holiday Monday when I had a myriad of other tasks to complete.

At a polling station where I felt like an outsider in my own community.

And I stood in line for close to forty-five minutes.

In the heat of a community centre that has already turned off its air conditioning and it's 22C outside.

My ID was checked and double-checked. (I don't ever recall that kind of scrutiny in the past.)

All to vote for a candidate who has absolutely no hope of winning my riding.

Why?

Because for me voting is far more than just a right, it is a privilege. A privilege that is denied to far too many women and far too many citizens of far too many countries in 2015.

Because my voice matters. The vote itself might seem lost in a ballot wave for another party's candidate, but my voice and my opinion will not be silenced. Many may loathe my opinion, but this is Canada and in spite of the many ways devised to keep me quiet and sedate, I will express my views through my legally exercised franchise.

Because I need to be a role model for a generation behind me that, while starting to get more involved in politics, still feels isolated, ignored by, pandered to, and tremendous apathy towards today's leaders, so much so that their voting numbers in past elections have been positively anemic. The youth vote could absolutely sway this election if their numbers double. Today's young people must be encouraged to get off of the sidelines and engage themselves through voting. This is their country and their voices matter.

Because I live in Canada and I voted for the best needs for this country, not another. I care deeply about my ethnicity and I live by my religious values, but I refuse to be marginalized in my own community nor will I allow another group to be victimized in an ugly and sustained campaign of "us against the other." As a Jew, I know full well what it is to be treated as "the other". My Canada has no room for this kind of repugnant behaviour toward its own citizens and my vote clearly and loudly expresses that opinion.

Because in spite of my tremendous concerns about every single party leader, I believe that holding my nose and voting for the least objectionable candidate is better than an abstention or a destroyed ballot that makes absolutely no impact, even as a personal stand. When this election is over, I will be able to face myself in the mirror and know that I did the best that I could have done.

Because this election and its disgusting campaign have been interminable and I truly just want it to end. I want an end to the ads, an end to the pundits, an end to the polls, an end to the opinion pieces, an end to the polarization, and an end to the hijacking of my social media feeds....an end. By voting today, I ended it for me.

If you voted in these advance polls, I commend you. If you haven't yet voted, I urge you to spend a few minutes on October 19th to do so, no matter where you live in this country. Your vote and your voice matter and need to be counted.

I will now focus all of my attention on the baseball playoffs.