Wednesday, 21 November 2007

Oscar or Felix

The husband and I have had an ongoing conversation (read: fight!!) that has lasted the entire length of our marriage. It is my thesis that a sloppy person has no trouble sharing space with a neat freak, but a neat and tidy individual cannot in any way live with a slob! Now in his defense, the husband is no Oscar Madison. He never leaves dirty laundry on the floor, he always hangs up wet towels, and he would never think to leave dirty dishes or half eaten food on the counter or in the sink. No, the husband is not a slob, but rather he lives in a world of controlled chaos. He has piles of s@#$ all over the house. There are mounds of invoices, magazines, bills, electronic bits and pieces, books and ancient computer discs all over the house. Yet, miraculously he seems to know what is in each of these man-made heaps. Rarely has a bill been paid late or a magazine been left exclusively for the blue box without first being read. His world works for him, even if it has the potential to sometimes make me go postal! I, on the other hand, live in a different orbit. My clothes are neatly folded and I like files for all of the paper work. My sinks are always wiped clean and the fixtures need to shine. (no water spots allowed-Bubby would be so proud.) Those who know me well, know that I have a strange fixation with vacuum cleaners. I own about 8 different types. (no-I am not exaggerating or taking poetic license-8 is about right!) I get a real kick out of examining what is new and cool on the latest models much in the same way that some people check out new cars. I cannot even begin to express how much pleasure an new hand-held gives me. My all-time favourite birthday present was when the husband bestowed upon me a Brother p-touch label maker. The husband and the sons have come to accept and understand the quirks because they know that with the oddities come some o.k. stuff as well. (They also know that if I find dirty, smelly crap all over the place I will go ballistic and it is easier to keep it clean then it is to be on the receiving end of my temper!) It is in this vein that I tell one and all that we have hit a wall in the reno. One could define this as a literal barrier in that nobody, not even tried and true Inside Reliable Contractor, has showed up in 3 days. We are at a loss to explain the absences as nobody has called nor answered their messages. Along with the literal barrier, I have hit the psychological one as well. We are in week three of the controlled chaos in which the husband thrives and drives me to chocolate!!!! (I am starting to wish that I drank) I am having trouble dealing with being cloistered in one room. I am having issues with mess everywhere. Worst of all, I cannot find a thing. Even the simplest of tasks is made ridiculous. Yesterday, I tried to open a package of something non de-script in the refrigerator and found that I needed a scissors. Damned if I knew where it was. Still don't, as the food in question remains intact!! (Probably didn't need the calories anyhow!) The weather isn't helping. November, after all, comes complete with short days, grayness and a dampness that is bone-jarring. I tend not to go anywhere that isn't an imperative right now and I really need to get out. I should probably use the time to organize the closets-if only I could find the damn label maker!!!

There really are now new pictures because nothing has happened. We are supposed to be getting an update from Overall Contractor later today so that maybe we can find out WTF is going on. The appliances are still on schedule to arrive on Saturday, but the husband is adamant that they cannot go in the garage. There is literally no room with all of the other waste stuff that has been stored. Given the weather and tomorrow's expectation of (gasp!) the "S" word, I suspect we won't see Outside Hunky for a while yet. We are really getting down to the crunch if we want the majority of the big stuff finished before our annual trek to the land of our people.


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