Wednesday, 11 May 2011

Yet Another Cell Phone Story Courtesy of Younger Son!

Oh, my youngest boy! The angst caused by you and your ongoing melodrama with Ma Bell's cellular division. When last we left the lad, he was fighting with Alexander Graham's namesake conglomerate due to a flawed contract over a defective crackberry device. That incident was just the most recent in a very long line of crappy cell service courtesy of Canada's premier cell phone provider. (Insert facetious smirk here!) Today we were witness to yet another chapter in Younger Son's continuing drama that I have entitled "Ask Not For Whom the Bell Tolls. It Tolls for HE!!" 

A couple of days ago, Younger Son noticed some odd behaviour emitting from his phone. He was able to call out and text out, but he was experiencing "service interupt-us" on anything incoming. The problem continued off and on for most of a day, but eventually all returned to normal and as such, he was reluctant to call or visit a Bell location. Today, it all fell apart. At about 5:30 pm, I called his number just to have a friendly chat, and I was summarily informed by a recorded message that his number had been temporarily placed in disservice. I thought that it was yet another quirky issue with his Blackberry, but the fun was just beginning. At 6:00 pm we get a call from a private number. It is Younger Son calling from a friend's phone asking The Husband to please get on the computer to Skype with him as his phone is out of service. When he tried calling out, he was automatically forwarded to Bell customer service. After being placed on hold for over an hour and having been transferred to 4 separate departments including home service support, cell service support, accounts, and fraud, he was disconnected!! Hearing your son scream and swear via Skype is an experience I could have lived without for a few more years. Within 30 seconds of his disconnection, our home phone rings and The Husband finds himself speaking with the same customer service rep that hung up on Younger Son. He wants the boy to call a special fraud number. DUMBASSS!!! The boy doesn't have a working phone because you assholes cut him off without explanation. Only Bell would operate their business this way. The Husband takes the number, keeps Younger Son on the computer via Skype and spends the next hour on hold with Bell's fraud squad. After a lengthy process whereby they have to verify everything from all the account numbers and phone number to his mother's maiden name, they convey the message that his phone has been cloned and that he will have to change his number. Another series of security levels and all is again right with his world.

A few questions for Bell.

1. Why didn't you send either him or us as the account holders, an email explaining the issue?

2. Why didn't you contact the home phone number with a prompt explanation that you were cutting off his phone?

3. Why connect him immediately to Bell service without connecting him immediately to the fraud squad? Why put him through every other department in your f*&#ed up company?

4. Why can't your customer service reps immediately discern that this was an issue for the fraud squad? Aren't you all on the same computer network?

I am so tired of these mega conglomerates that I am starting to wonder if we should go back to the old fashioned methods of communication. I was a Girl Guide. I still remember my semaphore!!

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