If you have spent any time at all reading and digesting the ramblings that often occupy this space, you will know that I do not spend a great deal of time on sappy sentiment and syrupy language. That isn't to say that I don't adore The Husband with all of my being, but neither of us seem to enjoy the gag-inducing patter that comes with Valentine's Day. But there are things that get my romantic instincts churning, and after all of these years together The Husband has become a master at decoding and deciphering. By the way...none of these have to do with paper hearts, flowers, jewelry, or expensive boxes of chocolates. Tell me if any of these sound familiar to any of you.
- I just love it when he cleans without nagging and prodding. There is nothing as sexy as seeing my man with a mop in his hand. Crazy? Perhaps. But nothing says "You Matter" better than knowing that we share and care for our space together. That and the fact that he knows what the smell of Windex in the morning does to me. Oh my!!
- Along that same theme, I outwardly smile when he gases up my car, takes it in for servicing, and of course gets it detailed. Now that's what I call true love.
- We really enjoy cooking dinner together. When both of us are actively involved in meal planning, there is a bond of together time that cannot be equalled with planned dates and excursions. That time spent as a couple is unchoreographed, intimate, and sacred. Far better than the best restaurant meal Toronto has to offer.
- He indulges my crazy hobbies, to most of which he is totally ambivalent. Broadway musicals, baseball, dogs...have all found their way into The Husband's consciousness. When I hear people tell me how much they have in common with their partners, I smile to myself and remember that the similarities that couples have may be the bedrock of their relationships, but it is how they deal with the differences that is truly the glue. (The fact that I am composing this post on one of the many electronic gadgets and toys I have accumulated over the years, is testament to my trying to figure out his world.)
When we got married, our total combined net worth was the bluebook value of a 1985 Hyundai Pony and a few small investments made with leftover Bnai Mitzvah gifts. It certainly wasn't about the money, nor did he capture the heart of the hot willowy blond cheerleader. We are who we are and that has proven to be more than enough after all of these years.
So on this Valentine's Day keep in mind that it is attention to the small stuff that is the basis of true romance. The big gestures? Keep them in your pocket for a rainy day.